love drunk part 3

have you ever been sad before? hey can i an be emo for awhile? it's been years since i last sung my heart and mind out... can't find a perfect time to express myself these days because i have been busy making others spit there misery out by having a laugh trip time with them.

I have never been okay, my mind wants to rest from all that mind games of hiding this "rot bag"; i asked if you have been sad because i want you to relate with me, not the kind of something emo sad i want you to be sad for nothing and the reason from this thread, which is something frustrating to think about with no obvious answers. i asked because like everyone else and like my title says it's a love related thingy.

why can't i be contented with what i have right now. though i'm lacking of something to put
beside my fingers, though i'm not hugging someone, though i'm not spending the rest of my time texting a special someone, though i'm not happy, though these things makes a melancholy vibe to myself but i accept everyone who will laugh about this.

i help people out from of there misery, i kept on telling them "how can that person love you if you don't love yourself, it's hard to fill a broken bucket. love means you love the same thing, if that person loves you, love yourself too. it will make them easier to love you and make them feel good about themselves." but how can i be like that if i can't even have an inspiration to do so? it's not like i'm asking to much, but it's been years of hiding. i have been strong but not long enough to reach the other end of my dark time. and it goes to show that i messed up big time, it's pathetic but rational for us to ask for help when it's been long after you fell at the cold cruel floor.

if there's anyone who could cheer me, will that be because i put this thing here? you guys must be laughing your ass off (which i will probably do so after a long time) but this is the only thing i know to put a helping for myself. like in a war i am like the noob guy who always get most of the shots but still live to get some more the next day. naive as you call it, atleast i made your time well spent...

thanks for the effort...