here in my room :(

I made a commitment awhile ago, and that was about my hopes of achieving most of my achievements before i end up being lonely.

i was devastated about my life lately, i can't seem to find where i last saw my fun drive. i kept on having these sudden thoughts about why shouldn't i be happy or something, i can't really explain it but it gets me down all the time.

i guess what really gets me down is the idea that i can't really get what i want even if the whole road to my goal is easy. my mind is keeping me from easy things and wants me to walk to the hardest and i guess both the peculiar path and hard level tends to bring me failure which is kind of the reason that gets me down. but i figured that if i keep on hoping inside myself that the world might change someday maybe, just maybe i will be alright and fit well on this so-called "beautiful world".

many of my friends doesn't really understand me, believe me i don't really mind. because for starters i always believe that there is really something wrong on how i show my true self. it might be because i'm really that weird inside my thoughts. second is all about my ability to hide my opinion on things. it's like they don't really know why and how i care about things and to be honest it's more than they think it is.

but tonight i'm giving my life one more chance, i'm restarting my whole life and approach every obstacles with one step at a time, i maybe a failure now but, nobody said we can't restart our lives, i'm gonna start over and leave everything behind except every experience that might come very handy. and instead of being a good PUA alone, i'll be a great PUA with a background of BU mastery! tell me ain't that be greaT!? well time is up, i have to go... ill post something shortly!